DO YOUR PART: ADOPT A FONK TODAY!

FONK FACT: FONKS DO NOT MOVE WHEN YOU LOOK DIRECTLY AT THEM

adopt a fonk

THANK YOU FOR SAYING

“I GIVE A FONK”

Giving a fonk to a loved one is just the kind of thing that can make everything a little better in the world. Many fonks are seeking adoption while the Moon completes a permanent sanctuary. If you give a fonk, you’re helping the cause: the world will be a little less fonked up, and you will be bringing playful fun into another home.

FS-0128: "It was briefly in my work elevator. It looked pretty uncertain about its surroundings."

FS-0128: "It was briefly in my work elevator. It looked pretty uncertain about its surroundings."

FS-020: Early fonk sighting with notable signs of phase transition.

FS-020: Early fonk sighting with notable signs of phase transition.

FS-0068-A: "I encountered the fonk in this hallway. It might have been waiting for someone to play with."

FS-0068-A: "I encountered the fonk in this hallway. It might have been waiting for someone to play with."

FS-0068-B: "I followed it down the hall before it disappeared."

FS-0068-B: "I followed it down the hall before it disappeared."

FS-0242: "I knew it wasn't part of the ironworks. But when I told my friend to look, it was gone."

FS-0242: "I knew it wasn't part of the ironworks. But when I told my friend to look, it was gone."

FS-0303: "It wsa trying to climb into the ceiling. We cheered it on, but it didn't seem to notice us."

FS-0303: "It wsa trying to climb into the ceiling. We cheered it on, but it didn't seem to notice us."

FS-0223-A: "There it was, lounging in the corner pocket like it was enjoying a soak. I thought maybe it didn't know the meaning of 'pool'..."

FS-0223-A: "There it was, lounging in the corner pocket like it was enjoying a soak. I thought maybe it didn't know the meaning of 'pool'..."

FS-0223-B: "It lunged for the 13 ball, which was ok with me because I was solids..."

FS-0223-B: "It lunged for the 13 ball, which was ok with me because I was solids..."

FS-0223-C: "...But when it went for the cue ball, we all agreed the game was pretty fonked up."

FS-0223-C: "...But when it went for the cue ball, we all agreed the game was pretty fonked up."

FS-008: In one of the earliest fonk sightings you can clearly see the fonk wasn't fooling anyone.

FS-008: In one of the earliest fonk sightings you can clearly see the fonk wasn't fooling anyone.

FS-103-A: In one of the most infamous encounters, a free-roaming fonk was sighted playing around in a mailroom.

FS-103-A: In one of the most infamous encounters, a free-roaming fonk was sighted playing around in a mailroom.

FS-103-B: At one point, it paused to consider how to have fun in this relatively boring environment.

FS-103-B: At one point, it paused to consider how to have fun in this relatively boring environment.

FS-103-C: After playing for a while, it sat in the corner for several minutes in a seemingly contemplative state.

FS-103-C: After playing for a while, it sat in the corner for several minutes in a seemingly contemplative state.

FS-103-D: Here you can clearly see the fonk was pretty chill about the whole thing.

FS-103-D: Here you can clearly see the fonk was pretty chill about the whole thing.

FS-099-Q: The only known photo of a health-concerned fonk.

FS-099-Q: The only known photo of a health-concerned fonk.

FS-0128: "It was briefly in my work elevator. It looked pretty uncertain about its surroundings."

FS-0128: "It was briefly in my work elevator. It looked pretty uncertain about its surroundings."

FS-103-A: A free-roaming fonk was sighted playing around in a mailroom.

FS-103-A: A free-roaming fonk was sighted playing around in a mailroom.

FS-020: Early fonk sighting with notable signs of phase transition.

FS-020: Early fonk sighting with notable signs of phase transition.

FS-0068-B: "I followed it down the hall before it disappeared."

FS-0068-B: "I followed it down the hall before it disappeared."

FS-0303: "It wsa trying to climb into the ceiling. We cheered it on, but it didn't seem to notice us."

FS-0303: "It wsa trying to climb into the ceiling. We cheered it on, but it didn't seem to notice us."

FS-0223-B: "It lunged for the 13 ball, which was ok with me because I was solids..."

FS-0223-B: "It lunged for the 13 ball, which was ok with me because I was solids..."

FS-099-Q: The only known photo of a health-concerned fonk.

FS-099-Q: The only known photo of a health-concerned fonk.

FS-0051: "It wasn't fooling anyone. Grass looks very different than a fonk."

FS-0051: "It wasn't fooling anyone. Grass looks very different than a fonk."

FS-333: "Quick with my camera, I snapped this fashionable fonk delighting in the early fall rain."

FS-333: "Quick with my camera, I snapped this fashionable fonk delighting in the early fall rain."

FS-0302: "There it was, on my mantle, showboating."

FS-0302: "There it was, on my mantle, showboating."

A PERMANENT FONK SANCTUARY IS ON THE WAY:

Yes, the Moon is making MELT, a habitat for Fonks where they can live, play, and fonk things up with ABSOLUTELY NO DANGER TO THE WORLD!

Won’t that be nice? Once MELT opens its doors, the world will no longer be at risk of melting! You can help, by supporting MELT through Patreon.

ALL ABOUT MELT

P;EASE WATCH THIS IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM THE MOON

OFFICIAL WORLDWIDE FONK ADOPTION DRIVE

〰️

OFFICIAL WORLDWIDE FONK ADOPTION DRIVE 〰️

Fonk Fonk
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WHAT IS IT?

It’s a FONK!

This lighthearted shadow creature from the Mysterious In-Between is the underworld sentinel everyone needs. Forged by the Moon to solve a problem that didn’t exist, this 18" fully posable shadow totem is endowed with the latest in ~dynamic symbolism~ and as every free-roaming Fonk may melt the world, we implore you to adopt yours today! In fact, why not adopt two and give a fonk to a friend? Every friend needs a fonk!

adopt a fonk

OFFICIAL STATEMENT FROM THE MOON

NO, THE FONK DOES NOT EAT PETS. UNLIKE OTHER SHADOW BEINGS OUT THERE, IT IS QUITE HARMLESS AND WE DON’T APPRECIATE THE SLANDER.

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THE FONK REPORT

All the latest Fonk info, straight from the Moon

YOU CAN TRUST THE MOON FOR ALL FONK FACTS – ONLY RELY ON OFFICIAL, AUTHORIZED FONK INFO

THe moon made a mess

YES, WE ARE AWARE THERE ARE FONKS LOOSE IN THE WORLD.
WE ARE WORKING ON IT.

Honestly, the Moon was only trying to help. It was just an innocent attempt to restore balance to the universe, and then, well, now there are Fonks. So many Fonks. We are trying to rectify the situation, as you know, and are officially rolling with it.

We’re doing our best to keep track of the fonk outbreak, and it’s becoming increasingly clear that traditional containment methods are no longer an option. The Moon wrote a poem about it, but it wasn’t very good. What has been published instead is the official apology below.

There is a whole big thing of official Moon business scheduled to take place. In the meantime, please, for the sake of cosmic order, take one into your home. Contrary to rumor, they are really not that problematic. They are very gentle, require no food, and they like objects. Objects are their favorite.

A Public Apology From

THE OFFICE OF THE MOON

Sincerest apologies for all the fonks. This was an accident, and we are working on a remedy. Some have been asking how could this happen? Well, The Sky was going through some stuff at the time. The Void was treating The Star pretty poorly, in our opinion. We thought we could step in and make things better. Now there are fonks. Sorry.

You know how sometimes you try to do something to make things better, but it just makes things worse? It was like that. And now, fonks are melting the world by touching it. We are on it. Promise.

In the mean time, there are two remedies we know work really well:

1. FONK ADOPTION

Each fonk off the streets and in a loving home means one less chance the world melts, and that’s good for everyone. They play well with most children and they tend to not move when you look directly at them, so that’s a couple positives. Read about more benefits below.

Adopt A Fonk Today

2. PERMANENT HOUSING

We should all probably get used to the fact that the world has fonks now. Good news is, we have plans to build a habitat specifically suited for fonks through THE MELT PROJECT. This is a planned facility in-between The Sky and The World where fonks can safely melt things, and moreover, live and play with dignity.

Support The Melt Project

LET’S DO THIS

Let’s face it: things are pretty fonked up right now. But together, we can build a better world: one that doesn’t melt when fonks touch it.

In a major, recent development, THE MOON has officially partnered with JOE SQUARE to drive fonk awareness and adoption. Please join the newsletter for all up-to-date, factual and official fonk-related information.